UntitledA friend has diedAnd many shall mournWe approach the funeral suffering and forlornBitter tears are falling all aroundAside this rain, there's but a soundThe shuffles of feetThe muffles of the sobsSome curse the bulliesSome curse GodWord after wordIt tore into her heartEating her awayUntil she broke apartNo one seemed to noticeAnd I don't think they caredMy best friend had diedShe wasn't preparedI lost a friendAnd she lost her heartBefore I knew it, it all fell apartThe rumors they spreadAnd her hatred did tooShe became a girl I know longer knewThe bitterness it spreadSo thick and so darkShe doesn't talk anymoreNot even her snide remarksSee, someone had diedBut others did tooBroken hearts all aroundOh, the tears how they flew.
MirrorsWhy is it when I call myself fatPeople comfort me?I didn't think loving my bodyWas a sad thing to doWhy is it when they call themselves skinnyEveryone applauds them?Sometimes they wish they were biggerBecause then they could fill everyone's eyes with wonderI learn not to hear these wordsWords that are like mirrorsTo reflect the flaws of my body to meBecause I know, one day, that mirror will shatterAnd if I hold on to those words which reflected my imageI'll end up cutting myself on the broken bits of "me"The insults I would have thrived uponInstead of chasing after the grand mirror,cutting myself on the would-haves and could-havesI'll invest in a new mirrorOne as golden as my body image isAnd one as small as the voice in my head telling me I'm "Beautiful as is"Because no mirror captures my image betterThan the one that is held by me.
Thick with SugarSweeter and sweeterAnother piece of cakeTastier and tastierThis pain she cannot takeSour, so sourA gumdrop or fourWhen the box emptiesShe only looks for moreChips and candyOh, she eats it allIf her sorrow was measured by her stomachShe outweighs them allSadder, and sadderHer stomach weighs as suchLouder and louderThe sound of her gutDrowning out the sadnessShe'll eat another slice of cakeHer stomach's as heavy as her heartBecause of this pain she cannot take
CannotI don't respond to affectionI don't think I deserve itBut when you cry, and want to dieI remind you that you're worth itI remind you you can do many thingsThings that I cannotAnd always I remind myselfI'm destined just to rotI don't see a future for myselfNo, it's just not thereBut whenever I can I'll make you understandIt's always thereIf I could give this depression away as easily as I give adviceThen maybe I'd be happyAnd my heart melted of ice
Glass Is Half EmptyIf her depression were measuredby the tears she's shedShe'd fill a glassAnd as alwaysYou'd ask for more.
LoveIs not "standing up" for your friendswhen you cut others downIs not the relationship that comes with free artAnd no late-night talksIt is not how much money someone spends on youFor clothes, websites, or anythingLoveIs built upon inside jokeslate-night phone calls,pep-talks before the big test tomorrowLove is laughterIn both sorrow and jubilationLove is the embrace you givethat never faltersBecause in this harsh worldWhen love seems to be the polluted definition oftragedy and angerAll we can do is give others the warmth of our wordsThe kindness of our soulAnd the assuring embraceTo go on another day.
AnchorsIf depression were like a seaConstantly threatening to pull me underThen you’d be my anchorDrowning me with the weight you make me carry
UntitledAge five was when she felt it, a painful sting in her heartAge five is when those tantrums began, just to keep her world from falling apartAge seven was when she compared herself, and knew she wasn't enoughAge seven was when she realized, just how much she wanted to give upAge nine she was a little girl who didn't have great luckAge nine she was a little girl who thought she was fucked upAge ten she wasn't human, she was cruel jokes and rumors, tooAge ten she wasn't a girl just like me or youAge eleven she wanted a boy just to know that she was thereAge eleven was the time she knew that no one really caredAge thirteen she realized this sadness, that loomed overheadAge thirteen she never had a feeling stronger, than wanting to be deadAge fourteen things got better, the weather not so roughAge fourteen she thought things may be starting to look upAge fifteen she found relief, something other than feeling numbAge fifteen she hasn't convinced herself that she's actually love
SocializationShe's got a nice front to her.Conversation seems easy.She seems like a lovely girl,But her attitude its just sleazy.--She thinks she's doing many great thingsBy being everyone's counselor,My, that has to sting,To talk to people for hours.--She's lazy and lonely, what a terrible mixWill she ever socialize properly?Or is that a problem we can't fix?--She wants people to talk to herBut she can't keep it goingShe seems like a smart girlBut her social skills aren't flowing.--Do people tire of her as much as she does them?Is she really happy? Does she really have friends?She's just a nobody in a sea of potential,If her social skills were better, maybe she'd become essential.
I'd Rather Be DeadYou're always asking me if I had anything worth dying for.I'll pose the opposite to you and ask you this:"Why is it that you find life to be worth living?"Is it so interesting to go through each day feeling anxious?To the point that you feel nauseated enough to collapse.Is it so joyous to spend each night staring at a blank ceiling,Hearing the clock tick on toward morning,And yet you lie awake.Tired, but awake, emotionless, but awake...Do you truly get up each day, facing it with optimism.Or do you look at the news and the state of the world,And genuinely fear for your safety?Now, if it were me that you had asked my dear,I'd tell you quite honestly: That I'd rather be dead.At least I would not have to hear the white lie inside my head.That tomorrow will bring me a 'better' day...But of course, you are welcome to believe that.
Stripping MeYou may take what you want from me,Be it my pride or dignity.You may throw insults at me,And burn the shredded pieces of my sanity.You may belittle me, as much as you want,If only to make your meager life worth living.---But even if you do all that...---No one will protect you when I pull you into the dark.No one will try to search for you, as my leather ropes tie you down.No one will hear your screams as metallic screws drive into your face,Etching an eternal smile, since you'll never leave this place..."Now then, my dear sweet James, shall we play our favourite game?"
Bully You're ugly.You're stupid.You'll never amount to anything.No one will ever like you.If you think he'll stay, you're mistaken.You have no friends.People hate you.You are a freak.You have no place here.You are nothing more than a coward whois too afraid to step outside half the time.Your face is like something from a horror movie.No one will ever truly fall in love with you.Guys want girls that are beautiful and face it,you are considered everything but that.Hide behind your hair dye because you want tofeign like you don't care.But inside the cruel eyes of others burn holes intoyour soul.You will never amount to anything.The only thing you will ever be good foris cleaning up dog shit.You will never be good enough.Why bother even dreaming?How can you consider the possibility of lovewhen everything you do, the way you look, walk,talk, move, think, can only ever be seen asugly.Not only is the outside hideous;the inside is no better.Why do you think you've
Past Tense BluesWasesAre painful,So are weres;And it's the becausesThat make them feelThat much worse.
We Only Live To DieThis is what we live for—these whispers on our lipsThe drying bits of blood on our paper-cut fingertipsOpening the letters that we left our future selvesA bittersweet reminder of those storybooks on the shelvesThis is what we live for – this emotion in our soulsThe torture and the bittersweet moments of lost controlBiting cracked lips with the dirt beneath our nailsThese moments of imperfection as our trains of thought derailThis is what we live for – shutting doors and opening eyesSmiling for a moment, before the tears reveal our liesThis is what we live for, this reality, this life…This is what we live for,As we only liveTo die.
You are someone's reason to liveShe had skin like a cactus-believing shecould only hurtanyone who gottoo close,forgetting thatinside,she held whatpeople neededmost.
You're Going to be Okay.It’s not your fault.It’s not what you deserve.Don’t think that way,Because one day,This won’t matter anyways.Keep your head held high for now,I know it hurts,Words can feel suffocating.As you feel like your lungs are collapsing,Under the weight of the pain,In your chest.I know it stings,And it seems like it takes forever for the bell to ring.As you count down the hours.But it doesn’t matter.When you just go home,To sit in your room alone.Because words unlike bruises don’t go away.Once they are said they are here to stay.And silence is excruciating.But being in a crowd of violent stares,Is no better.So where do you go?Is the question you’ll never know.But don’t give up just yet!Things will not always be like this.Yes, today seems hopeless.Tomorrow seems worse.One more day of hearing another hateful word.Might make your head explode,And sometimes you want to drive yourself completely off the road.And crash.Bu
i'd haunt you if you'd like.my hands are paralyzed and you're waiting for me to touch your face,but that doesn't really matter because i'd rather touch your souland if you close your eyes long enough i'll read you poetry as we lay atop the monkeybarsin this old and rusted parkyou can pretend to know the constellations and point them out to me and i'll tell you they're all beautiful, but nothing compared to youif i'm lucky you'll blush and laugh at me,tell me i say the dumbest things but deep down it'll register in your soul just how much i love youand i know they say you can only save yourself, but darling i swear if you'll just have the slightest bit of faith i'll save the fuck out of you or i'll destroy myself trying,because i honestly can't think of any other purpose for my lifeor what smidge of it i've been able to hold on to.
You have to know pain to....Sometimes you have to fall apart.You have to bleed out,In order to have the courage to shout.Against the darkness.You have to know what it's like,To feel disconnected,Separated.From reality.To be best friends with your anxiety,Because it's the only thing to keep you company.Because you've never felt so lonely.Even though you're surrounded in a sea of noise,Which drowns out your voice.As you choke,On society's nooseYou're afraid to cut it loose.Because you don't know what others will think of you.You have to know depression.You have to know what it's like to be alone.You have to know what it's like to be silenced.In order to appreciate breathing,And to fall in love with colors.After being blind,For all of that time.And only being able to see memories,On rewind.In order to appreciate a person's presence.And the feeling,Of content.When you finally find a friend.Who will stick with you until the end.And not judge you for your scars.But loves who you are.In
O K A YI stress too muchI don’t sleep wellSome days I’m happy,Some days it’s hell.If I complain, I’m seen as weakThey’ll mock and laugh for days and weeksYears of tortureYears of painI’m contemplating on ending this game.Helping others,I do that bestI just want to be treated like the rest.The game goes on,But I’m far from weakI’ll strive on forwardsMy light’s not meek.Things may be hardBut they’ll be okay.I can play this game another day.